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The Five Love Languages

Chapman’s love language theory suggests that each person has a specific way they prefer to give and receive love.

Words of Affirmation

Words of affirmation means the person prefers to receive love by way of spoken language or written messages. They probably enjoy being told they’re loved and appreciated and will respond well to love notes, texts, and encouraging words when they’re doing something. Did your partner do something really great or helpful? Make sure to tell them.

Quality Time

This person wants you to spend quality time with them. It can be shorter blocks of time as long as you give them your full attention. Someone with this love language will value quality over quantity. They’ll want you to put down your cell phone or any screen, make eye contact, listen to what they’re saying, and respond thoughtfully.

Physical Touch

Someone who has physical touch as their primary love language feels love when affection is shown physically. It could be sex, but physical touch is also about more than sexual encounters. They might enjoy a hug, back rub, cuddling, hand-holding, a gentle massage, and more. A person with this love language feels love by receiving touch, and they want to be close to a partner physically.

Acts of Service

Acts of service means doing things for your partner. Someone with this love language feels loved and appreciated when you help them with something. It could be running an errand, cleaning, cooking, or helping them with a project. People who receive affection through acts of service usually notice the things you do and might also perform acts of service for people they love.

Receiving Gifts

Someone with this love language responds when you give them gifts. Receiving gifts is about more than just getting things for this person. They also appreciate the time and effort you put into finding the right gift for them or for a certain moment. People with this love language will probably keep the gifts you give them and remember the gifts they receive.

How Learning Love Languages Benefit Relationships

Partners might not have the same love language, but if they can learn each other’s language, they’re more likely to make each other feel loved and appreciated. Chapman felt that learning a partner’s love language and practicing it was an easy way to improve the relationship.

Taking the time to learn how someone else prefers to receive love requires you to focus on another person’s needs, which can boost empathy and promote personal growth.

Chapman didn’t just create love languages for romantic relationships. They can also apply to parents and children, friends, and other family members. Learning the love language of different people in your life can help to enrich these relationships by making others feel loved, seen, and appreciated.

 

Reference:

Goldman, R. (2023, November 3). Love Language quiz: What speaks to your heart? Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/love-language-quiz-7562463

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